Laurance's World: The other side of autism

HAPPY THANKSGIVING...

2011-11-24T11:37:00.001-08:00

It's surf & turf for Thanksgiving dinner this year...yum..yum...

School is great

2011-11-07T22:22:00.003-08:00

Laurance loves high school...so does mom...

Sky High

2011-11-02T17:41:00.000-07:00

Lovin' my new high school...Skyview High School...

Starting to high school...

2011-10-17T14:19:00.003-07:00

He is now a freshman in high school...Laurance will officially start high school tomorrow....

School is going slow

2011-10-10T00:21:00.001-07:00

It's been an interesting school year for Laurance...its off to a slow start, which is what we wanted...the hope is that by going slower with his primary skills of reading, writing, and arithmetic, he might be able to catch up to grade level faster. Keeping fingers crossed...

School...

2011-09-16T10:35:00.000-07:00

Still trying to get the online academy to get our school set up...this is some real ineptitude on their part.

We're still moving...

2011-08-22T23:16:00.001-07:00

I can hardly wait to get into our new place...

Tucson Rental Homes

CAMP....

2011-08-10T12:16:00.000-07:00

Camp was great!!!! Got to ride a big horse that was part Clydesdale. Went swimming, saw a ton of wildlife like Colorado river toads and tarantulas. One night a javelina came into our cabin. Made my friends laugh.

One more week...

2011-07-19T17:31:00.000-07:00

...of camp. Laurance will be at camp for an extra week, as per his request.

Camp for a week

2011-07-16T23:31:00.000-07:00

Off to summer camp for a week tomorrow. Finally, I get to get out of this house. Mom needs a break from me, and I need one from her.

Leaving the house of rubble...

2011-07-12T22:41:00.000-07:00

I cannot wait until we get out of this house of rubble. This place has never been a home. I want to go some place where we can be happy again.

2011-07-09T23:18:00.001-07:00

We move into our new place on September 2. YAY!!!

Out of here...

2011-07-08T01:17:00.000-07:00

We are moving! YAY! On our way to a better place!!!!

Check out our new place:

Tucson Rental Homes

Dusting off the old blog...

2011-07-04T00:06:00.000-07:00

Well, here we are again. It has been a while; have been spending too much time on FaceBook to pay attention to our blog, but we are back. Updates to follow.

What will the bank do?

2009-11-26T19:03:00.000-08:00

Laurance and I have had a very frustrating 3-months. I have been trying to work out a loan modification with the bank, which has gone so ridiculously slow that I am ready to throw in the towel. I have an opportunity, in which, my attorney and long time friend, has offered to let me rent a house from him that I could move into today, but I just feel like I should try to save my house. The neighborhood we live in is beautiful and very safe. I don't know what to do. Help me Judge Spinner.

And so, it is Christmas time again...

2008-12-20T11:31:00.001-08:00

Well here we are once again, same place different year.

It is Christmas time again.

And so it Christmas, and look what we have done

We have created a baking mess,

Me and my son.

The stockings are crumbled up on the floor with little care,

As I count down the days before we are there.

Laurance, he yells "5-more days till we're there."

Then he smiles with a giggle and a wave.

I muster a smile right back at him,

Underneath my flour covered face.

"Oh, you had to remind me." I say, feeling so disgraced.

This he's done everyday

Since the end of the last holiday.

Well, here I am again, that same place I was last year;

Frustrated, cranky, aggravated, and tired.

Christmas is supposed to be fun!

A time of tidings and good cheer!

A time to be playful like a child!

However, here I am at the end of another year,

Counting the down time for it to be over,

Only to have it begin again, in one more year.

Restructuring and Reorganizing the site

2008-12-14T12:02:00.000-08:00

Hello, hello! Well Mom is coming back from her accident, it has been a painful one. Laurance and I were going to go see family in NM for Christmas, but the drive would be too painful for me, and Laurance wanted to stay home this year.

I am working on reorganizing this site, as well my other one. We are both going through a trasitional phase right now, which has very stressful in all areas, physical, emotional, and financial. Are spiritual faith is what keeps us strong.

We are still here and looking to create a better place to gather.

LaurA & LaurAnce

Mom has a broken ankle

2008-08-06T20:27:00.000-07:00

You would think at my age I would know my limits. Laurance and I went skating a few weeks ago. I was excited about taking him out so that he could get around other children, and then I could also get some exercise in as well. However, on that particular day the skating rink had several young children from neighboring daycares visiting. They are all so cute, but they kept skating right in front of me. Of course, this made me very nervous and on my gaurd. We had only been there a short time when I told Laurance that I wanted to go around one more time before leaving, sure enough, as old Murphy's Law would have it, I felt my right foot go out from underneath me. I tried to correct it, which was probably my first mistake. If I had just let myself fall, I probably would have able to drive myself home that afternoon. But, NOOOOoooo....I had to overcorrect, and this caused me to fall. As I started to go down, I could tell by the angle I was falling that I was going to break something, and there was nothing I could do accept wait for it. As I went down, I felt my foot bend underneath me and I heard a pop, that was my fibula breaking. My foot continued to twist underneath the weight if my body with the speed of the roller skates, and I heard snap, krackle, pop, pop, pop, pop, pop...that was my ankle breaking into pieces.

I had to have surgery to put the ankle back together. I am now wearing a cast, and I am wheel chair bound, and house bound.

I cannot stand this!! I have always been very active, and now I am going stir crazy being cooped up inside the house all day everyday. Poor little Laurance is going crazy too. Thank goodness he had Zoo Caper Camp the week of my surgery. He was able to stay with friends, which he quite enjoyed. Our friend Adam took him to camp everyday. Laurance liked having the opportunity to converse and exchange with an older adult male. Now, he is cooped with Mom, and he has to help me more than usual. Initially he stepped up to the task of taking care of me with a lot of vigor, but I think he did not expect it to take so long. Now he is asking me when I will be able to walk again. I told him his guess was as good as mine, but I speculated sometime around September. You should have seen how big is little blue eyes got, "September!" He said, "But, that's forever." (LOL!) At least I can depend on him for a good laugh.

I am very blessed to have Laurance and the VA. The VA took care of all my medical needs setting me up with a wheelchair and crutches, as well as a home health care aide. Not to mention, they took real good care of me at the hospital allowing me stay for two days since I only had an 11-year old to help me around the house.

Oh well, that is all for now. Laurance starts back to school on Monday, and I am also trying to get him in a lottery for a public charter school. Peace out and wish us luck.

School & Summer Vacation. Where Does One End and the Other Begin?

2008-06-22T16:14:00.000-07:00

Busy, busy! No time for rest! Gotta get this kid caught up with the rest.

The 2007/2008 school year was a very busy one for Laurance and I. He just completed his 5th and final year of elementary school. He will be going into middle school next year, yet he still sits at a mid 3rd grade level in math. This does not have to be except that TUSD in its infinite <choke!> wisdom <unchoke!> , decided to take him out of one school where he was doing very well, and place him into another one where he did not do so well. Their reasoning? Glad you asked. They felt that he would be better off in a school with a program that was designed strictly for autistic children. However, they did nothing to expand upon the skills that he had already acquired over the course of the prior two years.

During his 1st and 2nd grade years his development with his reading and math skills was at par. At the end of his 2nd grade year he was going into a literature program, and they had introduced him to division. He was the highest functioning child in his class. When he started at the other school they did nothing to expand upon the skills he had already developed. At the end of his 4th grade year he was at a beginning 3rd grade level in math, and he was meandering through language arts. They would put work in front of him that they knew he could complete without any direction, and would not challenge him, but would at best keep him busy for a few minutes. The school did very little to work with me, and they blamed me for his digression. The teacher refused to listen to me, and she would not implement any of my ideas. In the end Laurance suffered.

I removed him from there at the end of his 4th grade year, and thank God I did. I placed him into a better school that was closer to our home. His teacher and I were on the same page with his education. I showed her a stack of work that he had done from the year before, and she agreed with me; the other school had not done their job. The two of us worked together as a team. She would put forth the education plan, and I would have to approve it. She would send work home and state the expectations clearly. I would implement various tools to help him accomplish the task. For instance, he was expected to take 10 words, write them 3x each in alphabetical order, and use each word in a sentence. However, he had difficulty understanding how to alphabetize the words. He knew his ABC's, so I got the idea of writing each word on a flash card. This helped to provide a visual effect, and gave him better understanding on how to alphabetize words. Toward the end of his school year he no longer needed the flashcards.

By the end of the year he was at par in language arts, but he had only gained 6-months in his math skills. So, what does that mean? Laurance's Summer vacation, is not going to be much of a vacation. We are working on building his knowledge of division and fractions. This is a feat for me even with a masters degree, because my knowledge of fractions is challenged at best, completely lost at worst. That's all right, that's all right! We will be okay. I will refresh my math skills and be the smarter for it.

I'll keep everyone posted on the results....

Development

2008-06-02T21:40:00.000-07:00

When Laurance was 3-years old I began to notice delays in his use of language. The other children in his daycare were moving right along in the typical fashion, but I noticed his speech was at least a year behind the other children. He did not actually potty train until a month before he turned 4. Of course, the potty training was more of a power play tool than anything else. When I told him I had had enough and privileges were going to be taken away if he didn't start using the toilet, that was it he was potty trained. He wore pull-ups to bed for 2-weeks after that, then he decided that he didn't need them. He never went backward, or lost any of his skills.

Aside from his struggle with language he is really quite normal. However, his teacher recently pointed out that he is still at that huggy stage, which most children outgrow by the time they are 8 or 9. I remember my nephew at 8-years old becoming embarrassed when we would give him hugs and kisses at ball practice. Laurance has never had a problem with a public display of affection from those he loves.

Though he is still having some difficulty mastering his use of language, he has improved considerably, and he is continuing to grow. He is a very intelligent boy, and sometimes he surprises me at just how intelligent he is. In fact, he's learned how to use his developmental challenges to manipulate me; that is where I really have to be on my toes.

His delays are most noticeable in his use of language, and he needs to hone some of his fine motor skills. Other than that there are really no outside signs of autism. I am beginning to think that he is not actually autistic, but that he falls more within the spectrum; PDD or maybe aspergers syndrome. The most frustrating part of all this is that the professionals cannot agree. He has been evaluated by 5 professionals so far, and 3 have said autism; one of those 3 said that he needs to be evaluated more frequently. The other 2 believe it is simply ADHD. I cannot agree with a straight ADHD diagnosis either; Laurance's language delays at his age are not due to ADHD.

So, here I am still trying to get answers. Since he is high functioning he falls through the cracks, which means that I do not get the help that I would if he was considered low functioning. I am frustrated he's getting older, and the answers are going to cost me money that I do not have right now.

So, what am I doing about this? I'm selling everything!

Please check out my store on eBay, A Boutique of Everything.

MOM: Who is this child who is annoying me?

2008-05-31T16:50:00.000-07:00

LAURANCE: Who is the woman calling me son?

MOM: Would you stop leaning on me kid?

LAURANCE: Can I play my Game Cube now?

MOM: Not before you eat?

LAURANCE: (leaning on me with all his weight) But I want to play it now.

MOM: (narrowing my gaze at him) If you keep bugging me kid, I will take it away and you won't be able to play with it at all.

LAURANCE: NO! I want to keep it!

MOM: (faciously) How about a good beating instead?

LAURANCE: (emphatically) NO! It's against the law.

MOM: Come on, it won't hurt much, and besides it builds character. I know because my mom told me so.

LAURANCE: Mom, you cut that out.

MOM: (spanish accent) Ahh, you take away my fun.

LAURANCE: (No sooner does MOM turn her back and LAURANCE reaches out and pops her on her bum.)

MOM: Laurance Donaughvan that hurt.

LAURANCE: But it builds character, that's what Granny said.

It's been awhile,...

2008-05-28T13:05:00.000-07:00

...but we are still here. Mom's spirit is tired today . I started this blog with Laurance in hopes of reaching out to other parents and children with similar interests and challenges. I am embarrassed at the lack of attention I have given to the blog itself, and not just this one. My personal blog is waning even more (The Yo-Yo Dieters Connection). Nonetheless, Laurance has recently stepped up and expressed a desire to want to do more with the blog that we created together; therefore, in order to keep my childs spirit from spiraling downward to meet mine, I am attempting, yet again, to make the world of blogging a common household activity in our home and our lives.

It has been such a frustrating few months with Laurance graduating 5th grade and going into middle school next year. I have been talking to the school principal, guidance counselors, volunteer board members, psychologists, and in all the mayhem I neglected to contact his new teacher. Now I will have to wait until August, and I start school for yoga instructor training in July.

(AUGGHH!!!)
Could it get more frustrating?

Since Laurance is autistic I have to jump through a few more hoops than the average parent when getting him set up in a new school. Fortunately, I started jumping early on. Now, the only one left to leap through is the teachers, but, needless to say that will have to wait.

In the meantime, I have planned a fun and wet-filled vacation for us. Since we live in the Arizona desert, the wet part is the best part.

Laurance is now 11-years old, and expressing a desire to be closer to the girls. What better place to do that than the pool?

Happy Birthday...

2008-02-11T14:28:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone. Laurance just turned 11 on February 5, where did the time go. He is so big now. We had a small celebration with his class. I made an amaretto brownie cake. It did not look like much, but it sure did taste good.

Laurance just had his annual IEP. He is doing better this year than last. However, his math skills are still waning; he is currently at a 3rd grade level. His grammar is only a little better, but his reading and writing skills are progressing very well.

He is very fortunate to have a teacher that will work with me, unlike the last two years. Laurance actually started showing improvement when we created a schedule for him, in which he has two full days of school a week, two days where he comes home early, and he comes home for lunch one day out of the week. He realizes that these special privileges are dependent upon his willingness to listen to both his teacher and I, and he must do his school work and his homework. This has made it easier on me overall because not only will he do his homework, but he is also more willing to do his chores now too. It is great! I only hope that we will be able to carry this over into middle school.

That is all for now. Please feel free to ask questions.

Laura

Hello

2007-12-03T13:40:00.000-08:00

Laurance and I have been so busy for this holiday season. It has been so crazy, but we are pulling it together. Laurance is excited about his blog, and he keeps bugging me to work on our cookbook. We started it this last spring, but it has been held up due to funding issues. However, we are not giving up. The funds will be there when the time is right. Please take time to peruse our site, ask questions if you have any, and just make yourself at home.

Sincerely,
LaurA & LaurAnce

Halloween Costume

2007-10-27T23:41:00.000-07:00

I am very tired tonight. We have been decorating for Halloween, and I am composing Laurance's Pirate Costume. I am looking forward to the finished piece. Keep checking back for photos.

My post this evening must remain short, as I need to be getting some rest. Pleaes keep checking back, we try to post daily.

LaurA & LaurAnce

A Shark Tale

2007-10-26T23:56:00.001-07:00

Laurance and I were watching an excerpt from Nightline that they were doing on sharks. It was an excellent piece that spoke of the pirating of sharks for their fins. It was pretty upsetting and I started to cry. Laurance reached out and patted my back and said, "It's okay Mommy. They will have more baby sharks." I explained to him that the sharks cannot multiply that quickly, and he commenced to telling me a story he made up on the spot about a bull shark named Grasman.

I wish I could remember the whole thing, but it amounted to Grasman escaping the shark killers and turning back to kill 5,000 "China shark killers." The story was, to say the least, amusing. Even so, I noticed Laurance's eyes starting to water as he told the story of Grasman, Superhero bull shark.

I asked him if he could remember it so that we could write it down, but he was too tired. Maybe tomorrow.

I have to get some sleep now, this weekend we decorate for candy day, and I get to work on making Laurance into a pirate, of course.

Laura & Laurance

P.S. If you wou ld like to donate to Shark Conservation you may do so at the following link: http://web.conservation.org/xp/frontlines/2007/03260701.xml

Laurance lives in a special place

2007-10-25T19:12:00.000-07:00

Laurance is my 10-year old son. He is a very tender hearted boy. He has many talents including singing and story telling. He is quite the comedian too, there is never a dull moment with this little lad; of course, he's not so little anymore. He is almost as tall as me.

He says that he wants to be a famous and rich guy, so he can spend his money on all the things he wants to buy.

In his words:"I will spend my money on anything I want, like a bird or an iguana, or anything else I want."

Please comments are welcome.